Foods I Indulged in This Weekend--Should I Feel Guilty?

Have you ever heard of the 80/20 rule? You know, if you eat right 80 percent of the time, you should be OK to treat yourself the other 20 percent of the time? I don’t know how I feel about this rule... I mean, in theory, it should work. But personally, I’m a little suspicious. When it comes to food, I tend to behave in extremes--either really good, or really bad. I’m afraid if I abide by something like that, I’ll end up justifying my penchant for cookies or ice cream every afternoon and every night…

My trainer Sham Sanghera always reminds me that its ok to have interruptions or treats as LONG AS I EARN IT.The weird thing is that normally, when I earn it, I tend to not want it afterall. Unfortunately my "great thinking"this weekend has left me with serious bloating problems. Not to mention the spot right under my ribs is really hard when I press on it, and feels really uncomfortable.

Aside from investing in a personal trainer I've also come to find out that aside from being phenomenal my trainer could almost be a holistic Dr. (well in my eyes lol ). Sham helped diagnose me with a condition called Candida, if you're not too familiar with it. I encourage you to do some research on it. In a nutshell I've come to find out that I have serious hidden food allergies,I've been putting my body through so much pain and causing my intestines to flare causing HORRIBLE back pain.



OK,OK... Back to this weekend (I sometimes think I have A.D.D lol)

I was feeling the absolute need to be able just get crazy with foods I really shouldn't be eating. . I’m trying to be really deliberate about the indulgences I do pick and to enjoy them fully.

But after this weekend, the pain I experienced the morning after has really woke me up. My body is SCREAMING at me for putting this junk in my body. i feel sick, my stomach wont stop being so upset, and my back pain again has gotten the best of me..

Heres the foods that I basically sold my soul to yesterday:



1.4 tacos with the works, 2 sides of spanish rice,2 sides of beans, 2 sides of potato salad YUMMMMY... Will I be having it again any time soon? Nope! But the memory will linger...



2. A HUGE piece of champagne birthday cake! (I know , I know I cant believe I went back to this relationship, even if it was for only 10 minutes)

3. A kid’s-sized serving of chocolate chip ice cream (yum!)

Not ideal, but I haven't fallen off completely and I dont plan on doing that either! When you indulge in something, do you feel guilty? Does it completely throw off your healthy eating habits for the whole day, or the week? And how do you handle interruptions to your normal eating schedule?

I havent weighed 145 since high school!!

...and I still don't. (Heh heh--gotcha didn't I?) But I want to by the end of summer.

One thing I've learned through this whole healthy-not-crazy weight loss process is that little short term goals really motivate me. I love how my trainer is creating new benchmarks for myself and my workout buddy by ALWAYS changing our workouts up (whether that's by implementing a heavier medicine ball,more squats, doing more advanced core work, you get the picture ) I'm the type of person that gets bored and results will slow. I'm so happy I've found Sham! I havent been bored yet!

So, it's time for another mini goal-setting session! I want to lose at least 5lbs by my next weigh in (first week of May). What do you want to do?

(When I step on the scale..I'll tell you what happens--)

I'm ending my relationship... My breakup letter...

“Dear Sugar:
I'm writing to tell you it's over. This time I'm serious...I thought I loved you. And you know what? Maybe, once, I did. But I'm on to your games—I know that just because you're "organic" that doesn't mean you're healthy. I know that I can't eat just one thing of you. I know it's easy to give into you late at night, or see you after lunch and dinner, and think nothing of it. Every time I turned around you were there. It just seemed like you and I were a natural fit. But not anymore! I don't want to see you again. If I run into you at work or at the grocery store, I'm not going to look at you. You're not invited to my house anymore. My heart—and my thighs—can't take it. You and I are over. OVER! And you know what? I will still see our mutual friend—organic milk-even without you. And you can't do anything about it. Get out, Sugar. I can't see you anymore. I will think of you always. -P”

Yesterday...

I had this fabulous idea to meet up earlier (at 4pm instead of 5pm)with my trainer Sham being that I had an appointment at 6pm. Well,that "fabulous idea" sure did backfire on me. I arrived at the fitness room super tired yet excited. I hopped on the treadmill and starting chatting away with my fitness bud Michelle.

In came "him"..you know, my trainer.. the one that is responsible for me walking like a baby dear this morning. He instructed us to hop off the treadmill and follow him outside.

"What? Why???" I asked

"We're going to be training outside today" said Sham

I thought to myself, this is NOT what I signed up for. My diva side was totally coming out lol. Ugh, no skin moisturizer on my face, its cold,whyyyyy do we have to do this, WHY WHY WHY WHY WHY!?!?!

We crossed the street, and there we stood waiting for instruction from Sham. He started us on a "warmup" that consisted of high knee skipping,an exercise that involved our knees up then ending with a kick (i felt super silly doing this btw), and the 3rd was a side skip and we were to remain low the whole time. Wooo what a warm up!!

NOW... time for the workout... Ladies and Gentelmen I believe at this moment Sham should've presented me with THIS...





HAHA! I started doing pushups while Michelle RAN up this steeping sidewalk and had to come back to me then we switched off. I believe we did 2 sets of on/off switching which included situps, and squats AH...!

The total workout took us 19minutes.. and I about DIED, no I'm not over exaggerating. I never felt so much out of shape. Time to get back on track!! No more excuses!! =)

I'm a baby

No Really I am!

I complained way too much today(I believe even before I started)

As I walked into Shams room of torture (haha) I walked in to see my fitness partner Michelle melting away on the treadmill while Iiiiiii struggled on the eliptical. 

"Gosh, she sure is getting smaller" I thought " It's amazing what ONLY 2 WEEKS will do"

Lets just say I have ALOT of catching up to do.

I havent been doing any core work due to hurting my back (not exercise related). But now that I'm back, I have something up my sleeve bwaahahaha.. you little weaklings get ready. This is something my Trainer NOR Michelle knows about..

This blog is SUPER short, but its better then nothing.. I have a pounding headache from being obese and running haha! I'll blog more tomorrow.

P.S. Michelle, its on like Donkey Kong!!

When Things Go Wrong, Do You Turn To Food?

I do. I realize in the great scheme of things, my “really bad day” is TODAY! My back pain has gotten so bad, my day started with me sitting in my car crying.


I am not PMSing, but I feel bloated and gross from my week of bad eating, and all I wanted to do today after work was train with Sham and my workout buddy Michelle. I got up this morning struggling to walk, my back pain has gotten the best of me. Clearly this was not a personal grievance the Exercise Lords had against Priscilla, but my vulnerable emotional state made it feel that way.

I feel a little bit rejected and really annoyed that I cant workout today. I finally got out of my car and walked into an office full of panera bagels, with an array of cream cheese crap—you know, the kind with the sugar I’m not supposed to be eating.I decided to have half a bagel, but it wasn’t enough (it never is)I was too embarrassed to walk back to the counter and grab another half. No amount of bagels is going to make me feel better; I'm not looking for food, I'm looking to get my way in to still workout, I'm looking for my back pain to GO AWAY, to feel better about my body. Wouldn’t life be easy if we could get all that coated in rainbow sprinkles?


This morning keeps pricking me with little thorns in my side—I am trying hard not to blame myself for my recent acts of compulsive eating, because I really, truly believe this addiction is an illness like any other—drugs, alcohol, gambling, whatever. Lack of willpower isn’t what makes alcoholics turn to a bottle to sate the disappointments of their everyday lives, and I know that lack of willpower alone isn’t what makes me turn to food, either. I think accepting that I am not a weak person or that I need not to be “punished” for turning to food (only when I EARN it) in these situations will give me the freedom to move forward.

It is my hope that what will eventually free me from this compulsion—and yes, eventually allow me to have the body and the life I strive for—is constantly admitting to myself (and to you) the honest reality of my struggle.

So, in the spirit of that honesty and self-acceptance: When was the last time you turned to food to deal with an “everyday annoyance” or disappointment (trust me, nothing will sound too silly to me!)?

My "Fat"astistic voyage... grrrrr...

I havent updated this blog in so long, I've decided today to make this part of my daily routine. Why? Many reasons, but the most important one...I have fallen off the bandwagon BAD, and I feel this is the only way to hold me accountable. 3 weeks ago, when I was being persistent and diligent with what Sham was asking I was seeing GREAT results, now I'm starting to slowly gain everything back that I've worked so hard for. Is it my awesome trainers fault? Absolutely not! All fingers point back to me..


Whats my weakness? Well, obviously food... just all the wrong kind. What am I doing to earn the food I love?? Nothing!!! Thats right, let me sit back and have 3-4 cookies,2 slices of pizza, kick back and relax... let all that food absorb into my body and settle in REALLY nicely into pure fat! Why do the good choices I need to make seem so far out of reach for me? Am I THAT lazy? Surely, its been hard to incorporate my core exercises and 30 minutes of cardio into a daily routine (I havent been in the best of health lately) but my eating habits are NO excuse.


I'm starting to slowly poison myself with all the food I know I should be staying away from. Processed, high sodium, loaded with sugar foods. I'd be lying if I said I didnt feel good while eating them, because I do... its how I feel after that gets me. Guilty, no..no... disgusted, my choices are slowly creeping up on me taking away that "GEEZ I LOOK GOOD" feeling. One thing I HAVE been keeping consistant with is my water intake, I cant live without my 96 oz =).

You might’ve noticed that I haven’t posted any photos of myself in my blog. I’m feeling like a stuffed sausage in my clothes, so let’s just say I haven’t exactly been in the mood to say, “Hey, take a photo of me for my blog!” to anyone.

My friend Kelly just sent around pictures from her birthday party over the weekend. When I saw this photo, I cringed. I just "untagged" the photo on Facebook and almost crawled under my desk to hide—no way in heck was I going to post it on here for all of you to see.

But then, I figured, it’s time to face it. This photo is my reality check, and I decided to post it because

A.) it’s me, and I cannot hide who I am, ever... and..

B.) it reinforces what I’ve felt all week: my eagerness to get back to all the healthy habits I’ve developed over the past few weeks so that a little relapse doesn’t turn into a titanic regression.

So here it is—puffy face, puffy waist: